Moderate In Moderation

[brightlotusmoon]

A conversation online that made me giggle:

Him: So, What are you, politically?
Me: Moderate.
Him: Moderate what? Moderate Republican? Moderate Democrat?
Me: Yes.
Him: Which one?
Me: Yes.
Him: Yes what? Yes moderate Republican or yes moderate Democrat?
Me: Yes!
Him: Who are you, River Song? Why can't you just answer my question?
Me: (long pause) Spoilers!
Him: You know what, I can't talk to you anymore.
Me: Because I don't fit in any of the boxes you have?
Him: Whatever. Bye.
Me: I have a really nice big box right here. It's blue. It's bigger on the inside. You should try it! I can make you some tea and brownies.
Him: (silence)
Me: YOU DO NOT REQUIRE TEA?
Him: (Apparently signed out)

Dear Internet: Is there a rule that I've missed that requires a person to be One Thing Or The Other Thing? Because I never got the paperwork. Was there a deadline? Will I get a summons? Can I just vote "Whatever" on the next ballot?
Also, I am very very tired of hearing the phrase "they are disgusting" in the same sentence as either "conservatives" or "liberals." Please quit insulting all my friends. My friends are awesome. I can manage to be friends with both anti-abortion rights folks and anti-gun rights folks and nobody has killed each other. This makes me happy.
Dear World: Learn to live together. We all die in the end anyway.