We are whom.
Mar. 23rd, 2014 10:05 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
brightlotusmoonHistory hurts. Repeating a painful history still hurts.
I will sound very defeatist, pessimistic, exhausted, fed up, lost, and afraid to fight: I don't know if I can prevent my friends from using slurs and pejorative phrases that clearly insult disabled people. I know I can respond to "Oh get over it, it's no big deal, stop getting your panties in a twist, etc" with "Fuck off, you know I've asked you to stop." However, I can't fight. I cannot snarl every single time I am with a group and someone says that something (not a person) "is so ret***ed." Because I myself will feel like I am losing battle after battle and I am so tired. The people in my life, especially the assholes with hearts of gold who know they are assholes with hearts of gold, are willing to die and kill for me. I will defend them forever. I realize not everyone will respect my choice of family among these friends. But you know what, these friends know me, understand me, respect me, love me... even as their humor and sarcasm on my Facebook translates to what seems like ugliness. I watch "Archer" every week, after all. And as long as I have that battle axe gifted to me by my favorite asshole with a heart of gold, I can make fun of myself.
I don't know why I wrote all this. I dont know what my brain wants lately.
I will sound very defeatist, pessimistic, exhausted, fed up, lost, and afraid to fight: I don't know if I can prevent my friends from using slurs and pejorative phrases that clearly insult disabled people. I know I can respond to "Oh get over it, it's no big deal, stop getting your panties in a twist, etc" with "Fuck off, you know I've asked you to stop." However, I can't fight. I cannot snarl every single time I am with a group and someone says that something (not a person) "is so ret***ed." Because I myself will feel like I am losing battle after battle and I am so tired. The people in my life, especially the assholes with hearts of gold who know they are assholes with hearts of gold, are willing to die and kill for me. I will defend them forever. I realize not everyone will respect my choice of family among these friends. But you know what, these friends know me, understand me, respect me, love me... even as their humor and sarcasm on my Facebook translates to what seems like ugliness. I watch "Archer" every week, after all. And as long as I have that battle axe gifted to me by my favorite asshole with a heart of gold, I can make fun of myself.
I don't know why I wrote all this. I dont know what my brain wants lately.
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