What is a more extreme version of "Ouch"?

So, thanks to my nervous system, musculoskeletal system, and fibrous connective tissue, my entire body feels as though it has been dragged through hell and back. If I were beaten severely, then flayed open and seared with burning iron slowly across every section of my body, and then given mild electric shocks until every muscle convulsed in vicious spasms, it would probably amount to the same level of pain that I am in now.
I an going to bed now. My medications - prescription, supplemental, and herbal - have just started to work. With luck, I will feel better tomorrow.

Could people please comment with something good, wonderful, and happy? Thank you.